On the morning of October 25, 2025, I was having it out with God.
I had just had brain surgery, and I was frustrated, angry, and confused. I was disappointed in myself. I felt helpless because I didn’t have a village. How was I supposed to rest and find time to heal? I had to make sure I was okay so I could take care of my son. So there I was, yelling at my ceiling.
Two hours later, at 12:42 p.m., my phone rang. It was the third time the hospital had called that morning with updates on my son, Gnosis—who we call Gino—as he waited in the hospital for a heart transplant.
I answered the phone, completely flustered.
“Hi, you guys already called me,” I said. “I already got an update, so I don’t really understand what’s going on. Is something wrong?”
They reassured me that nothing was wrong, asked if I was sitting down, and said the words that would change my life forever.
“This is the transplant team. We just signed an offer for a heart.”
The woman who called me sat on the phone in silence while I screamed and cried for seven minutes straight. I forgot I was on the phone. When she finally spoke back, she was crying, too. She told me to take my time, but that I needed to get there. The way I sounded on the phone, you would’ve thought someone died… and someone did. Many of my tears were for the family on the other end.
It took longer than two hours for me to leave my house because my knees kept buckling. I kept collapsing to the floor. It was like my perception of the world just shifted. I had been in survival mode for so long.
We first found out something was wrong with my son when I was 22 weeks pregnant. During a routine ultrasound to find out the gender, they took a closer look and said the left side of his heart was too small to pump the oxygenated blood through his body. They said he could possibly have something called Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome (HLHS), but I didn’t believe them. I went to the Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia (CHOP), one of the best hospitals on the east coast, and they confirmed the diagnosis. They said he was fine in the womb, but when he came out, they would be concerned.
They monitored my pregnancy very closely. I had all my gynecological and prenatal appointments through CHOP. They were very hands on, very loving. They treated the families with so much love and care. We were fed at our appointments, we had access to snacks, breakfast, etc.
After Gino was born, he had his first open-heart surgery six days later. In the years after that, he went through countless other surgeries, corrections, and tweaks. I always thought he’d get a transplant around 13 or 14. I was hoping he’d be able to enjoy his childhood. But instead, his entire youth has been hospital stays. I could barely work, he could barely go to school. He’s had over 15 surgeries, and he was in the hospital for a year. He got to a point where he was throwing tantrums because he became flustered. We both grew extremely impatient, like we were experiencing cabin fever. He was in the hospital, stuck in a room. We had to have a round table meeting to see if it was conducive to his health to even go outside and get some fresh air. It was a lot, and we were both cracking under pressure.
The stress eventually took a toll on me. I started having ischemic strokes, and ended up having to have brain surgery to correct blood flow right before he got his heart offer. I had been under such stress as a single mom. In 2023, we relocated back to New Jersey from Fayetteville, NC. I’ve been doing this by myself ever since. I had to learn CPR, first aid, and how to drop a feeding tube into my son. It’s not the norm, and not everyone can handle it.
Honestly, I relied on God. My relationship with God has grown tremendously over the last three years. I have a strong prayer life, and for some reason, my destiny helpers come and help out. My teacher from high school is still very hands-on in my life. She will fund whatever we need. She and her wife are super helpful, and they actually get mad when I don’t ask for help. When my rent was backed up or my car was repossessed, they helped with bills and got my car back for me. They have a church where they’ll ask for donations for us. They even helped me with homeschooling. They have been amazing.
Once six months have passed after transplant, I plan on reaching out to the donor’s family. I don’t know what it’s like to be on the other side, I only know what it’s like to be the mother of a recipient. To lose a soul, a person that you love and cherish—you would think they’d be selfish, and want to hold onto them for a little while longer. When someone passes on, you plan a funeral and you want to bury them. But to have it in your heart and mind to say, you know what, let’s just give what we can. Who thinks like that? The selflessness is incredible.
In 2025, I was able to experience love. The truest expression of love. If I could say something to the donor’s family right now, I would tell them thank you for having a heart to give a heart. You gave my child life.
I know it can be scary to sign up as an organ donor because of the times that we’re in. When I got pregnant, I removed myself as an organ donor because I had all these fears … but I get it now. Being an organ donor is beautiful. You can save a life, just like my son’s.
My hopes and dreams for Gino include watching him continuously bloom into a brilliant, peculiar, and curious soul. He has so many questions and he’s so strong-willed. What I birthed is bigger than me. He’s not easily moved or shaken. Even when he’s scared, he still does it. He has shown me that no matter what you’re faced with, you keep going. Sometimes you slow down a little bit, but you’re not taken off your path. You always make the mark. The stress, the long-suffering, it builds endurance, strength, and resilience. Gino is like a 35-year-old man trapped in an 8-year-old’s body. I don’t know what his purpose is, but I know it’s big, and he’s just walking it out until he makes history. He’s about to be nine. I want him to accomplish everything his heart desires. Because of his donor, he has that chance.
75 or more lives can be saved and healed by one organ, eye, and tissue donor. Sign up today!